Gideon's 2nd Birthday
Dear Gideon,
It’s midnight and I’m laying in bed while you have your feet on my chest laying side ways on the bed. While me and papa are forced to share less than half the bed on the other side. And honestly... I’m thinking... this won’t last. Cause one day you’ll want your own bed. One day you won’t want to snuggle in bed with me any more or let me sing you to sleep. So I’m just gonna let you prop your stinky feet on top of my chest.... and confess to the social media world that I’ve been in denial of you turning 2.
I thought to myself... well if I don’t show any photos... then it didn’t really happened. But as I was editing your birthday DAY photos... I couldn’t help but realize.... you DID turn 2... whether I wanted you to or not.
and you did grow and become a big boy even though I still see you as my baby....
the morning of your birthday... while you were still asleep I turned to your papa and just cried... because I couldn’t face the fact that you were now 2... a year older than you were a year ago... a year closer to not needing me to do most of everything for you. A year closer to moving out... a year closer to living your own dreams...
I’m glad we got to spend time together eating breakfast because one day you’ll be making your own. And I think I might just miss having to clean up after you have thrown your food all over the place cause that means you’re not a kid any more....
We thought really hard about what to get you for your birthday. You seem to be happy with just about anything... a wooden spoon that you’d use as a drum, a cup that you’d use to transfer water from cup to cup then to the floor, an orange that you would poke your finger through to make holes, or even flour to throw around... and we also could’ve gotten you more pop up books but we decided on this.
The Dog Dog. The thing you gravitate towards for nearly 30 minutes every time we visit target. You would go straight for the Dog Dog whenever we go into target and without fail... ride around on the Dog Dog forever.
We didn’t buy it all those times cause we thought... well you love target and so do we so you can just ride it there. lol! But now that playing in target isn’t an option any more... we decided it was time we take home The Dog Dog.
To see your face light up every time you sit on it. And to hear you ask us to pull you around us the best. Your joy is our joy. And we wouldn’t have it any other way.
Mommy also loves the dog dog cause it is also a TSA approved luggage. Bahaha! So if you ever catch us at the airport most likely Gideon will be riding The Dog Dog
One of my favorite things to do with you is to prepare breakfast. Sometimes you help sometimes you don’t. But when you do it sure is a treat. Seeing you explore the textures, tastes the flavors, ask “this!?” And “this!?”, and then make a huge mess at the end (swipe to the end to see the mess). It’s worth it. So so worthit.
The morning of your birthday we made one of your favorite things.., PANCAKES! But these were extra special they had @everlastingferments sourdough in it so they were extra soft and moist and even slightly chewy!!! They were a big hit with you as always!
After you helped me “clean” by washing the dishes aka moving stuff around in the sink and splashing water everywhere. You don’t really “clean” the dishes but you definitely “wash” them and pre soak them so mama doesn’t have to scrub as much.
I’m excited to experiment with more foods with you this year!! I’m so proud of you and your taste buds you’ve grown to love more and more flavors each month. I really thought you would survive on kraut cereal and fruit for the rest of your life. But I’m glad your palate is developing and you’re appreciating AND tasting more things!
One thing I hope you remember are all the people that love you. The ones that have been there for you through thick and thin. The ones that have loved you before you were formed. The ones that cheered you on as you came into the world. The ones that picked you up when your heart was hurting. The ones that let you drag them around. The ones that make kraut and booch and yogurt for you. The ones that know your biggest pet peeves and your most favorite things. The ones that just get you. Those are the ones that I won’t ever let you forget.
Living in a home with friends and family is like living in a village with hand selected people that have chose to do hard things in life together and champion the victorious things.
I hope you remember those who have surrounded you in these past 2 years out of the womb and 9 months in the womb. We love you. We believe in you.
Thank you to all those who have sent so much love to Gideon via snail mail, shared a social distancing hug, video chatted, and just shared in the excitement for another year of life for our mighty man of valor.
I know your favorite time of day is NOT nap time. But secretly it’s my favorite time. But it’s also my least favorite time. It’s a time where we get to cuddle close while I sing and nurse you to sleep. It’s a time that you rest your legs on mine while you settle down. Or fight sleep all together and try to tickle me or run away from me. It’s also a time where I get to rest and recharge for a bit before we have fun again. But it’s also a time where I miss you being awake. It’s a weird combination of feelings that I feel at the same time. I know I need some rest, but I also can’t wait till you wake up.
When you do finally wake and come out of the room scraggly haired and groggy it’s one of my favorite looks on you. Your hair gets so disheveled from you sweating. Lol!
Usually after nap is lunch. One this particular day of your birthday we got your favorite thing... Raising Canes chicken tenders. Hahahaha! Your love for fried chicken runs deep and it always amazes me how much you can eat of it.
Papa me and enjoyed watching you eat your chicken and lick off most of the frosting from your @hapacupcakes . We didn’t want your birthday to be just any day. But rather a day of all your favorite things. And it truly was!
I love seeing you live your best life discovering new things everyday and in every way imaginable. My favorite thing to do is to watch you be in awe at the “normal” things that I take for granted. You give me fresh eyes for life, and an appreciation for the things that do would have never taken a moment to observe.
My biggest wish is to see you find joy in all life. To be able to come through any challenge and still feel victorious. To know that your worst fears are just temporary road blocks to your greatest wins.
With that being said, the second to last part of our day together you did what you always do. Eat oranges. Not one, not two, but FIVE. You probably ate most of the tree this season. And that’s ok. Getting to see you get all slippery and slobbery over oranges is the best thing ever.
I hope you never lose your wonder and will always hold onto your zest in life.
I’ve discovered that childhood is fragile. Because every time I look back at a day or time in the past it’s gone. I can’t hold on to it. I can’t smell it. I can’t experience it again. Every minute, second, hour, day, month, and year with you is fragile. I know that in a split moment... you’ll be become more of who you were meant to be. And I don’t blame you. Each stage of your life has been more fun than the next and your only 2!
I hope your future days months and years will be fun, fruitful, and festive. I look forward to making more memories with you. Thank you for being patient with me even when I was busy and couldn’t stop right away to play trains with you. Thank you for understanding when I told you something you didn’t want to hear. And thank you for always forgiving. Your big heart always inspires me to love, forgive, and move on.
Love you my little sunshine!
Love,
Mama
